The Tunnel: Nobody knows the trouble I've seen.

Life!
Is life's journey a series of tunnels?
You never know how long you have to walk,
You never know when there will be light.


When I walk through this tunnel like walkway, I am reminded of my friend Gwen telling me." There is always light at the end of the tunnel."

This tunnel resembles a tunnel which had etched in my mind. September 29th, twenty one years ago, my son Andrew was born, and we were told he was dying. I chose to be with him when he died. The hospital kindly gave me a room in the parents' floor of another block which was the nurses' block. This was for parents whose babies were in ICU.

The block was quite a distance from the baby's ICU, and was connected by underground tunnels. If you miss a turn, you could end up in another block. When I walked past what the nurses call the groaning dragon, the boiler, I wanted to walk quickly. Everyday, for 55 days, I walked this tunnel twice. It was not a walk I wish for anyone.

 On November 22nd, I walked that last walk. I left the hospital's main entrance with empty arms.

Just before Andrew's 21st,  this photo was my catalyst for Andrew's book, and propelling me to be on Television, and public speaking. and taken a role of comforter to other grieving parents.

I like to share this with my fellow bereaved mother Heather. I have sung this song and shredded buckets of tears.


http://youtu.be/NY7w1P78mAs

http://youtu.be/4EJSkJlh_fg


http://youtu.be/SVKKRzemX_w

I am linking my blog post for Heather, whose son was murdered. They are trying to get a bill to pass Cameron's law to make eye witnesses to be responsible.

http://annkitsuetchin.blogspot.co.nz/2014/01/support-bill-for-camerons-law.html

https://www.facebook.com/CameronsLaw/info

The tunnel that was the catalyst of my book.

The Tunnel.

Life!
Is life's journey a series of tunnels?
You never know how long you have to walk,
You never know when there will be light.



Then there was this tunnel or maze which played a very significant part in my life. The nurses used to get to the Nurses’ Home when they ended their night shift at 11 pm or started their morning shift at 6 am. They told me that while this was a longer walk, it was much safer, and more comfortable if it rained and in winter time. They also suggested that I not walk alone because it could be quite scary, and one never knew what weirdoes may have sneaked into the tunnel. The nurses always walked in twos and threes. They advised that if I left Ward 11A at around 11 pm, and waited round the entrance of the tunnel, there were bound to be nurses heading back, and it would be safer if I joined them.

In November 2008, I started blogging and made many online friends. On October 30, 2010, it was Halloween, and many internet memes I had joined were featuring on this theme. I don’t believe in Halloween and didn’t post ghosts and witches’ photos. For the topic ‘dark’ I posted a photo of a tunnel of my local Westfield shopping mall, making it black and white. It turned out very effective as a dark and fearful picture.

I didn’t make the connection to the tunnel of 1989, but when my fellow blogger Ginny commented that it was like a hospital corridor, her comment opened up a flood gate of memories. She seemed to be able to read my mind despite the fact that Ginny is thousands of miles away in the USA.
Here is the link to it. As a picture tells a thousand words, no matter how I describe it, I can’t beat the photo. You may like to view it.
http://ann-mythoughtsandphotos.blogspot.com/2010/10/photohunt-dark.html
When I walk through this tunnel-like walkway, I am reminded of my friend Gwen Bettridge telling me," There is always light at the end of the tunnel." This was during her visit to me when Deborah was born.

She said, “There will be sleepless nights, there will be piles of laundry and nappies, there will be piles of dishes unwashed in the kitchen sink”
It seems I had unconsciously posted that shopping mall tunnel which resembles another tunnel which had been etched in my mind. Twenty-one years ago, my son Andrew was born, I chose to be with him until he died. The hospital kindly gave me a room in the Nurses' Home.

The block was quite a distance from the baby's ICU, and was connected by underground tunnels like a maze. If you missed a turn, you could end up in another block and be lost. When I walked past what the nurses call the groaning dragon, the boiler, I wanted to walk quickly as the dragon not only groaned; it shook and created an earthquake. Every day, for almost 50 days, I walked this tunnel twice. It was not a walk I would wish for anyone.

On November 21st, I walked that walk for the last time. The next day, I left the hospital's main entrance with empty arms.

borneo post press

3 books by Sibu author set for launching

Posted on October 6, 2013, Sunday

SIBU: The three books penned by Sibu-born author Ann Chin Kit Suet is slated to be officially launched at RH Hotel here on Oct 12.
Second Finance Minister Dato Sri Wong Soon Koh has been invited to launch the books, which are written in English.
This was announced during a press conference at Guangning Association here yesterday. Also present were association chairman Kong Tze Ling, Penghulu Ten Kim Loong and Chin’s family members. Chin’s first book `Diary of a Bereaved Mother’ was published in Kuching in April 2011. It tells of a mother’s trauma sitting for 55 days by her new born son Andrew who was struggling for breath. She loved him, but was unable to help him.
Rebecca Blithe, who received the book, wrote: “For parents undergoing similar experiences, this book can be a great comfort. For health professionals in this field, I would see it as essential reading.”
Chin’s second masterpiece ‘From China to Borneo and Beyond’ was published in February this year. It tells of two families, Chans and Kongs, and traced their history from 1907 in Kwang Zhou, China, to the jungles of Borneo.
It also touched on the Opium war, virgin tropical jungles, World War II, Colonial era and the communist insurgency.
Chin’s latest effort ‘Mail Order Bride’ was published in July. It embodies the darker side of today’s social issues that could arise in any big city from obsession, mail order bride, murder, suicide, toy boy, con Romeo, mother-daughter rivalry, paedophile, child pornography, prostitution, modelling, fraud, childhood shenanigans, runaway street kids, anorexia, nervosa, teen pregnancy street kids and boy racers.

Read more: http://www.theborneopost.com/2013/10/06/3-books-by-sibu-author-set-for-launching/#ixzz2rsKmg72X

kuching book sigining

http://www.theborneopost.com/2013/10/22/sibu-born-author-holds-book-signing-session/

Site Last Updated 4:48 pm, Thursday

Sibu-born author holds book signing session

Posted on October 22, 2013, Tuesday

GREAT AUTHOR: Chin (seated) with others at the signing session.

KUCHING: Sibu-born author Ann Chin Kit Suet held a signing session at Smart Bookshop, Plaza Merdeka here, of the three books she penned.
Chin who now lives in New Zealand was a former student of the Minister of Local government and Community Dato Sri Wong Soon Koh.
Born and bred in Sibu, Chin has self published the three books – A Diary of a Bereaved Mother: Goodbye My Baby (non-fiction), From China to Borneo and Beyond (non-fiction), and Mail Order Bride (fiction).
Wong, who is also Second Finance Minister, said being a writer is not easy, especially when one wanted to make a living out of it.
He pointed out that the beginning is always the hardest as the author is unknown.
“But, when you ask any author why they wanted to write, they have many reasons. If an author could come out with very good books, then the author could earn lots of money, but most of the time making profits is not always the point.”
The books are available at Smart bookshop of the Summer Mall and also at Plaza Merdeka.
The signing session was a success whereby Chin managed to meet up with her long time former students, friends and relatives.
Smart book shop also just opened their 5th branch at the Summer Shopping Mall with an opening promotion of 20 per cent discount for all books and special discount for stationery.
For more information, the public are advised to call 082-673858.
Smart bookshop is proud to participate in this event and will continue to collaborate with local authors to promote local talents in book writing.

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Borneo Bulletin

http://borneobulletin.brunei-online.com/index.php/2013/10/15/sibu-born-author-ann-chin-kit-suet-promotes-books/

Sibu-born author, Ann Chin Kit Suet promotes books

 

Posted date: October 15, 2013 In: National

|     Abdul Hakiim Yakof     |
A PRESS conference was held for the Sibu-born author Ann Chin Kit Suet to promote her three books, which was held at Ximply Chriz Café in Regent Square, Kiulap yesterday.
Ann who is an English teacher, teaching English as a second language to immigrant children at Point Chevalier School, New Zealand, wrote three books; Diary of a Bereaved Mother; From China To Borneo & Beyond and Mail Order Bride which were launched October 12 in Sibu, Sarawak.
Her first book, Diary of a Bereaved Mother, is her autobiography and written journey of knowing her newborn child did not have long to live to eventually losing her child and how she coped after.

Ann Chin Kit Suet and her three books. – ABDUL HAKIIM YAKOF

The book propelled her into public speaking, which she did to share her experience with other bereaved parents.
From China To Borneo and Beyond was her second autobiography book, which is a hundred year old journal of two Families, the Chans and the Kongs. The book contains records of historical events and current affairs endured by her family from 1907 to 2006 such as the Opium war, virgin tropical jungle, the Japanese World War, colonial days, revelation and fighting with the communists.
Her third book, Mail Order Bride is the first fiction piece from Ann. She said that the book targets an audience of young adults and that it appeals readers interested in social issues and ills that young adults have to face.
Ann said that she has been writing since she was little and the people who motivated her to write were her late father and her former history teacher during her days in Methodist Secondary School Sibu, Dato Sri Wong Soon Koh, who is now the Minister of Local Government and Community Development in Sarawak, Malaysia.
“Dato Sri Wong Soon Koh, once brought books by Han Suyin into class and I was amazed that a Chinese born author can write English books. This inspired me to pursue my career as a writer,” she said.
She is also very active in charity work such as setting up funds to support deaf children in Kenya and the NTU Wives funding for separation operations of conjoined twins.
She also said that money from book sales of Diary of a Bereaved Mother go to Sands New Zealand which is a parent-run, non-profit groups supporting families who have experienced the death of their child.
“I didn’t write my book “Diary of a Bereaved Mother” to make money, I wrote it to help people, but all the publicity eventually propelled me into public speaking”, she said.
When asked on her future plans, she said, “I will try to write more fiction in the future, and with the leftover material for ‘From China To Borneo and Beyond’ book, I might just write a sequel of the book.”
Ann’s books can be found in Sarawak Community Library’s, Auckland public Library’s in New Zealand and in New South Wales Librarys in Australia.
Her books are priced at $35 each, $60 for two books and $90 for three books.
For purchases and enquiries, the public can contact Wong Ngie Sek, the Director of Aptbility Trading Company at 8720255 or email at wns@aptbility.com.bn.

borneobulletin.

http://borneobulletin.brunei-online.com/index.php/2013/10/15/sibu-born-author-ann-chin-kit-suet-promotes-books/

Sibu-born author, Ann Chin Kit Suet promotes books

 

Posted date: October 15, 2013 In: National

|     Abdul Hakiim Yakof     |
A PRESS conference was held for the Sibu-born author Ann Chin Kit Suet to promote her three books, which was held at Ximply Chriz Café in Regent Square, Kiulap yesterday.
Ann who is an English teacher, teaching English as a second language to immigrant children at Point Chevalier School, New Zealand, wrote three books; Diary of a Bereaved Mother; From China To Borneo & Beyond and Mail Order Bride which were launched October 12 in Sibu, Sarawak.
Her first book, Diary of a Bereaved Mother, is her autobiography and written journey of knowing her newborn child did not have long to live to eventually losing her child and how she coped after.

Ann Chin Kit Suet and her three books. – ABDUL HAKIIM YAKOF

The book propelled her into public speaking, which she did to share her experience with other bereaved parents.
From China To Borneo and Beyond was her second autobiography book, which is a hundred year old journal of two Families, the Chans and the Kongs. The book contains records of historical events and current affairs endured by her family from 1907 to 2006 such as the Opium war, virgin tropical jungle, the Japanese World War, colonial days, revelation and fighting with the communists.
Her third book, Mail Order Bride is the first fiction piece from Ann. She said that the book targets an audience of young adults and that it appeals readers interested in social issues and ills that young adults have to face.
Ann said that she has been writing since she was little and the people who motivated her to write were her late father and her former history teacher during her days in Methodist Secondary School Sibu, Dato Sri Wong Soon Koh, who is now the Minister of Local Government and Community Development in Sarawak, Malaysia.
“Dato Sri Wong Soon Koh, once brought books by Han Suyin into class and I was amazed that a Chinese born author can write English books. This inspired me to pursue my career as a writer,” she said.
She is also very active in charity work such as setting up funds to support deaf children in Kenya and the NTU Wives funding for separation operations of conjoined twins.
She also said that money from book sales of Diary of a Bereaved Mother go to Sands New Zealand which is a parent-run, non-profit groups supporting families who have experienced the death of their child.
“I didn’t write my book “Diary of a Bereaved Mother” to make money, I wrote it to help people, but all the publicity eventually propelled me into public speaking”, she said.
When asked on her future plans, she said, “I will try to write more fiction in the future, and with the leftover material for ‘From China To Borneo and Beyond’ book, I might just write a sequel of the book.”
Ann’s books can be found in Sarawak Community Library’s, Auckland public Library’s in New Zealand and in New South Wales Librarys in Australia.
Her books are priced at $35 each, $60 for two books and $90 for three books.
For purchases and enquiries, the public can contact Wong Ngie Sek, the Director of Aptbility Trading Company at 8720255 or email at wns@aptbility.com.bn.

brunei press release

http://www.brudirect.com/national/national/national-local/8808-sibu-born-author-ann-chin-kit-suet-promotes-books

Sibu-Born Author, Ann Chin Kit Suet Promotes Books

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Category: Local

Published on Tuesday, 15 October 2013 07:37

Written by Abdul Hakiim Yakof

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Kiulap: A Press conference was held, for the Sibu-born author Ann Chin Kit Suet to promote her three books, which was held at Ximply Chriz Café in Regent Square, Kiulap yesterday.

Ann who is an English teacher, teaching English as a second language to immigrant children at Point Chevalier School, New Zealand, wrote three books; Diary of a Bereaved Mother; From China To Borneo & Beyond and Mail Order Bride which were launched October 12 in Sibu, Sarawak.

Her first book, Diary of a Bereaved Mother, is her autobiography and written journey of knowing her newborn child did not have long to live to eventually losing her child and how she coped after.

The book propelled her into public speaking, which she did to share her experience with other bereaved parents.

From China To Borneo and Beyond was her second autobiography book, which is a hundred year old journal of two Families, the Chans and the Kongs. The book contains records of historical events and current affairs endured by her family from 1907 to 2006 such as the Opium war, virgin tropical jungle, the Japanese World War, colonial days, revelation and fighting with the communists.

Her third book, Mail Order Bride is the first fiction piece from Ann. She said that the book targets an audience of young adults and that it appeals readers interested in social issues and ills that young adults have to face.

Ann said that she has been writing since she was little and the people, who motivated her to write were her late father and her former history teacher during her days in Methodist Secondary School Sibu, Dato Sri Wong Soon Koh, who is now the Minister of Local Government and Community Development in Sarawak, Malaysia.

"Dato Sri Wong Soon Koh, once brought books by Han Suyin into class and I was amazed that a Chinese born author can write English books. This inspired me to pursue my career as a writer," she said.

She is also very active in charity work such as setting up funds to support deaf children in Kenya and the NTU Wives funding for separation operations of conjoined twins.

She also said that money from book sales of Diary of a Bereaved Mother go to Sands New Zealand which is a parent-run, non-profit groups supporting families who have experienced the death of their child.

"I didn't write my book "Diary of a Bereaved Mother" to make money, I wrote it to help people, but all the publicity eventually propelled me into public speaking", she said.

When asked on her future plans, she said, "I will try to write more fiction in the future, and with the leftover material for 'From China To Borneo and Beyond' book, I might just write a sequel of the book."

Ann's books can be found in Sarawak Community Library's, Auckland public Library's in New Zealand and in New South Wales Librarys in Australia.

Her books are priced at $35 each, $60 for two books and $90 for three books.

For purchases and enquiries, the public can contact Wong Ngie Sek, the Director of Aptbility Trading Company at 8720255 or email at wns@aptbility.com.bn.

Press release

http://www.thestar.com.my/News/Community/2013/10/06/Local-writers-books-to-be-released-on-Oct-12/

SIBU: A local writer, Ann Chin Kit Suet (pic), will have her three books released for sale by Second Finance Minister Datuk Seri Wong Soon Koh on Oct 12.
Ann, who spoke at a press conference yesterday, said the books were Dairy of a Bereaved Mother, From China to Borneo and Beyond, and Mail Order Bride.
Also at the press conference were Guangning Association chairman Kong Tze Ling, community leader Penghulu Ten Kim Loong together with Ann’s family members, associates and friends.
Ann’s first book was published in Kuching in April 2011.
The book is an account of a mother’s trauma during 55 days of taking care of her newborn son Andrew who was struggling to breath.
“A review of the book by Rebecca Blithe wrote: “For parents undergoing similar experiences, this book can be a great comfort. For health professionals ‘in this field’, I would see it as essential reading,” said Ann.
The second book was published last February.
It is about a hundred-year journal of two families — the Chans and the Kongs going back to 1907 in Kwang Zhou, China to the jungles of Borneo followed by six generational records with a second wave of migration to England, Canada, Japan, Singapore, Australia and New Zealand.
This book covers the story of the Opium War, virgin tropical jungle, Second World War, colonial days, a revolution, and a fight against communists which the families had to go through.
As for the Mail Order Bride published in July 2013, it is about the darker side of today’s urban social issues such as obsession, mail order brides, murder, suicide, mother-daughter rivalry, child pornography, prostitution, modelling, fraud, childhood shenanigans, runaway street kids, anorexia, nervosa and teen pregnancy.

Presentation at the Sands Conference

http://www.sands.org.nz/conference.html

Presentations from speakers.

I gave a presentation at the Sands National conference and it is available here.

Sands 2013_Ann Chin_Asian Infant Bereavement.pdf

Griefing: Helping you grieve: Gardening and Writing

Come this September, Andrew would be twenty five years old. But Andrew never even celebrated his first birthday on earth. I grieved for him, and in 2011, I published his book. Without publishing his book, I would probably still be grieving his loss. With his book, I moved on to helping other bereaved parents grieve.

I tell grieving parents to keep a journal. Just a note pad would do, It is very therapeutic. You can write any time. Most of all, when you lie awake. and sleep deludes you.

For a whole year, I wrote and wrote. I wrote some as letters to my siblings. Some I wrote to God, my anger with him. These notes I kept to myself. I wrote my thoughts of trouble, of anger and of fear. This grief journal can be very cathartic.

You needn't go back and read them. I didn't go back and read my notes until Andrew was 21st. I eventually took them out, because I knew nobody would write his book if I didn't write them.

If you like a nice scrap book, buy a good scrap book. you can stick all the cards people give you. I didn't, I kept them in files. You can also cut out poems you find in magazines and newspaper. It is your scrap book, nobody should tell you what is right or wrong.

It is recently, I got very passionate about the computer that I had neglected my gardening. Yesterday a fellow online friend talked to me that I should spend some time with my plants. I had a mother bromeliad.

I went to the mother plant to transplant it to my pots. The mother has 3 babies, and I yanked it. Hoping to transplant them too. In so doing, I could kill the plant.

I thought of the analogy of the Mother plant as a bereaved Mum. My own experience was Andrew as a sick baby, yanking it didn't hurt as much as my  grieving mothers whose babies and children had been yanked and killed.  My heart bleeds for them.

I am linking my blog post for Heather, whose son was murdered. They are trying to get a bill to pass Cameron's law to make eye witnesses to be responsible. http://annkitsuetchin.blogspot.co.nz/2014/01/support-bill-for-camerons-law.html https://www.facebook.com/CameronsLaw/info

Auckland University

What a privilege to have my Alma Mata, Founded in 1883, Auckland is now the country’s largest university with 38,500 students, nearly 10,000 of whom graduate annually. The main campus is in the heart of Auckland city and we have four specialist campuses.

 circulate my books.

Photo: Aucklander.
Diary of a bereaved Mother: Goodbye my baby  is

Available at GENERAL LIBRARY New Zealand & Pacific Level G (155.937 C539 )

Tear Fund and Deaf in Kenya.

Tear fund reminds me of my charity for the Deaf in Kenya.

 

Dan Bremnes was in MT Albert Baptist Church this morning. He spoke to us and reminded me of freezing Canada when I was a student there.
Dan is a truly gifted Canadian worship artist and grew up serving on his local church worship team in Canada. He is immersed in writing, performing, arranging and recording music. He was at MAB on Sunday 26 January with TEARfund(inbetween playing at Parachute Festival). He is an awesome communicator and musician, Dan came with Gavin, senior product Manager, Beth, Sheena and Sharron.

http://rubytuesdaytoo.blogspot.co.nz/

http://www.suelovescherries.blogspot.com/

 
http://reducefootprints.blogspot.com/

Trunk/chest

Yesterday a pair of siblings, aged 7 and 8, died inside a hope chest. I googled to find out a hope chest is made of wood. I felt so sad for the parents.

Authorities say the pair became trapped Jan. 12 in a chest that had been recalled because it could only be opened from the outside. The deaths have been ruled accidental.

http://www.boston.com/news/local/massachusetts/2014/01/19/funeral-set-for-franklin-children-trapped-chest/DI9gBa4NeJLX65yRNSMgtK/story.html

http://www.boston.com/news/local/massachusetts/2014/01/14/franklin-children-deaths-termed-tragic-accident-hope-chest-was-produced-during-recall-year/WMGv7hcZOX0pv1Ye0uhu8O/story.html

I took a photo of this chest, when Dad came hope from England by plane, his chest traveled by sea. I was 4, and I remembered Mum and Dad carrying the chest back from the motor boat. It was a metal metal truck that it took both of them to carry it.

Mum and Dad always warned us not to go inside it.

It was the trunk that was symbolic of the day Dad came home from England. I looked far and while to look for a trunk.

I took this photo waiting for a chance to write a story. This one in the photo was to represent my dad's chest, we called it metal trunk. He brought it back from England. No one in the village had seen a chest like that.

Oscar Grant shooting

I just watched a movie with my children. It's a real story of how a 22 year old Oscar was shot by the BART police at Fruitvale station.

It impacted me. First, in 1977, I was at the BART area. Oscar was gunned down, too young at 22. He left behind a young daughter, a young girlfriend and his Mother.

My Son Andrew died, he was a sick baby, It was easier to accept. But  Oscar was a healthy young man. I feel for his mum.

I feel sick to the stomach, because the police was released just 11 months after in prison.

http://youtu.be/PmJzYvDbi8Q

http://youtu.be/Q2LDw5l_yMI

Support Bill for Cameron's Law

Dear friends,

I am posting this on behalf of a fellow bereaved mother whose son was murdered.

Support Cameron's Law is designed to bring awareness to, and get a bill passed into law that forces witness's of child abuse to report it.  

https://www.facebook.com/CameronsLaw/info

  
This is the bill that my daughter wrote and we are sending to the Senate and the President :

Sponsor............Christianna Harris
Short Title: Cameron's Law
October 16, 2013
AN ACT
TO: Require that any time child abuse is suspected or witnessed by any citizen or non citizen 

Today I met a Heather, a grieving mother online and she told me her son was murdered. My heart went all out for her and asked if I could help her in anyway. She has a page is trying to get as many likes on the page as possible to try and get this law passed..

 I chatted with her sister Chavelle to piece the story.

http://m.topix.com/forum/city/apopka-fl/T6LGISEA07U3QUQEB

In 2008, 6 years old Cameron Palmer was in the care of his 49 year Old Grand Uncle. Tony Gonsoulin, has been arrested and charged with child abuse and murder after abusing his six year old nephew to death. Tony is imprisoned for 20 years. 

Police interviewed Richard D'Ginto, a neighbor who witnessed the boy being dunked from over a dividing fence. The neighbor told police he saw Gonsoulin submerge the Cameron underwater for 20 to 30 seconds at a time, while shouting at the boy.

"The man held him under water and he'd tell the boy, 'You do what I tell you and stuff like that,'" D'Ginto said.

The bill will mean Richard D'Ginto, a neighbor who witnessed the boy being dunked from over a dividing fence will have to report the offense.

 

Contact Cameron's mum, Heather: Facebook: http://facebook.com/soldjagirl33

Email:	soldjagirl33@facebook.com